A beautiful setting, a family reunion and a pair of brand new white shoes.

A couple of weeks ago we had some family visiting from out of town and so we took a trip to our favorite BBQ place. How can I describe this place? Well I guess I would have to say that it’s on the edge of the middle of nowhere. You turn off a two lane road out in the country. This place is so rural that they didn’t even bother to paint lines on the road. Just before the pavement turns to dirt you turn off into a gravel driveway between a couple of small farms. You can eat inside or sit under the covered porch next to the stream behind the restaurant.

Here is where my story begins - a beautiful setting, a family reunion and a pair of brand new white shoes. My niece was so proud of her newest purchase and wanted to show them off. But the moms were in full force with their cameras determined to get everyone huddled together for a barrage of ‘candid’ photos. As people jockeyed for position you can guess what happened. Someone stepped on the shoes. The perfectly white shoes. Someone who had recently been wading in the creek. Oh snap!

In the New Testament we have an account of Jesus sending out disciples on a ministry trip. He gives them some specific instructions on what to do, what to bring and how to act. He also said this –

“If people do not welcome you, leave their town and shake the dust off your feet as a testimony against them.” – Luke 9:5 NIV

The original word that was translated into English as ‘against’ could also be translated ‘before’. Let me explain. This world has a way of messing up your new shoes but we have to choose how we will respond. You could see the look on my niece’s face. She was not happy but fortunately she is a gracious young lady. They were after all just a pair of shoes and the perpetrator was her cousin that she loved and rarely gets to see. She chose what was most important.

I think the lesson here is to not let other people’s mistakes, offense and sin transfer to you. Dust it off. Right away. If we aren’t careful dirt on our shoes can quickly become a smudge on our heart.

“Who may ascend the mountain of the Lord? Who may stand in His Holy place? The one who has clean hands and a pure heart…” – Psalm 24:3-4b NIV

… and white shoes.

The legacy of a country boy from North Carolina.

The Reverend William Franklin Graham Jr., known to the world as Billy, finished his race today. He was 99. He was often referred to as ‘America’s Pastor’ and his ministry reached untold millions of people. As we remember the legacy that he left I can’t help but reflect on what made him who he was.

He was humble. Born on a dairy farm in North Carolina he never forgot his roots. In a day and age where Pastors and Evangelists have become their own ‘brand’ and market themselves like a Fortune 500 company the only brand Billy was pushing was Jesus.

He was persistent. His ministry spanned 7 decades. It took him around the world, brought him before kings and queens, presidents and prime ministers. Long after others would have settled down he pressed on.

“Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” – Philippians 3:13-14 NIV

His message was simple. Jesus died for your sin. Faith in Him is the foundation of forgiveness. More than political influence, fame or fortune Billy wanted people to know that God loved them and Jesus came to save them. That straightforward message allowed him to cross cultures, denominations and political aisles.

“For I resolved to know nothing while I was with you except Jesus Christ and him crucified.” – 1 Corinthians 2:2 NIV

His character was uncompromising. I’ve never heard anyone criticize Billy Graham’s character. He conducted himself with honor and integrity. He successfully navigated the pitfalls of lust and greed that so many ‘superstars’ have found themselves in. He was known for taking extreme measures to ensure that he wasn’t disqualified along the way.

“Dear friends, I urge you, as foreigners and exiles, to abstain from sinful desires, which wage war against your soul. Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us.” - 1 Peter 2:11-12 NIV

A great man went home to be with the Lord today. But I can’t help but think that the things that made him great are all things within our grasp. We can be humble. We can persist. We can share the Good News of Jesus. We can live with honor and integrity. See I think we estimate his worth by the multitudes that he reached when God esteemed him for the man that he was. God saw a man who was faithful with little so He entrusted him with much. God chooses which doors to open. It is up to us to be ready and willing to walk through them when He does.

*Biographical information was found at www.billygraham.org/about/biographies/billy-graham/

Too Many Tomatoes!

I was talking with a good friend this past week about sowing and reaping.

“Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers. – Galatians 6:7-10 NIV

He began to ask me questions.

“What do you get if you plant tomatoes?“

“Tomatoes.”

“What do you get if you plant corn?“

“Corn.”

“What do you get if you plant a little tomatoes?“

“A little tomatoes.”

“What do you get if you so plant a lot of tomatoes?“

“A lot of tomatoes.”

“What do you get if you plant nothing?”

“Nothing.”

“WRONG. You get weeds!”

Let me share another passage of Scripture with you.

“Jesus told them another parable: “The kingdom of heaven is like a man who sowed good seed in his field. But while everyone was sleeping, his enemy came and sowed weeds among the wheat, and went away. When the wheat sprouted and formed heads, then the weeds also appeared. “The owner’s servants came to him and said, ‘Sir, didn’t you sow good seed in your field? Where then did the weeds come from?’ “‘An enemy did this,’ he replied.” – Matthew 13:24-28 NIV

You don’t have to do anything to grow weeds! And that applies to every area of our life. That is one of the things I really appreciate about what Paul said in Galatians. God’s law of sowing and reaping applies to natural things and spiritual things. It applies to relationships and money. It applies to this life and eternity.

Farmers plant every year so they can harvest every year.  And we need to keep sowing faithfully. We need to invest in our families, in our health, in God’s Kingdom, in friendships and in our walk with God. My friend also pointed out that we need to sow the most in our areas of need, not our areas of abundance. See if you have more tomatoes than you know what to do with maybe you should focus on something else like corn.

And that’s a sacrifice. When there is an area of need in your life it takes an act of faith to let it go. But faith is the real seed that moves God’s heart. When you plant that seed of love, of compassion, of forgiveness or of generosity you are putting it into God’s hands where it can truly begin to grow.

“So neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow.” - 1 Corinthians 3:7 NIV

All God asks is that you trust Him with your seed. You will reap what you sow IF you don't give up! I used to see that as waiting patiently, but then I noticed the 'therefore'. Not giving up isn't sitting around, it's getting up and sowing some more, "as we have opportunity."

Mirror, Mirror.

Once Jesus was asked what the most important commandment was -

“Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”” – Matthew 22:37-40 NIV

There are a couple of things that I want to draw attention to –

First Jesus says the second greatest command is ‘like’ the first. The original Greek word for ‘like’ means similar or resembling but it can also mean corresponding. Jesus was saying that loving your neighbor is connected to loving God. Of course He elaborated on this when he taught,

‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’ – Matthew 25:40b NIV

The second point I want to make is that we are to, ‘love others as ourselves’. Here we find the foundation of the ‘Golden Rule’.

Here is where the problem lies. To truly love others as ourselves we must learn to genuinely love ourselves. Since the Fall the devil has been peddling his lies and offering a counterfeit to everything God has. Most people either have very little love for themselves or if they do it’s not the ‘agapao’ love spoken of in this verse.

The lie is that I/you/we are unlovable. That is simply not the case. You were created in God very image and so loved by Him that He traded His Son for you. I wish we could really get that to sink in to the core of our being. The lie robs us of our confidence and keeps us either isolated from others or trapped inside of destructive relational cycles. People who don’t value themselves frequently find themselves the victim of their own insecurity. True validation cannot come from an outward source, it can only come from an inward revelation of who we are in Christ.

The counterfeit to confidence is arrogance. Arrogance elevates oneself above all others seeing them as simply a means to an end - the end in this case being self. On the other end of the spectrum is false humility which whispers to us that we are less than everyone else. It may appear more ‘spiritual’ but is no less detrimental in the end. To see yourself as anything less than what God sees is to say that He made a mistake and doesn’t know what He is doing!

True confidence and humility brings everyone else up to our level as we begin to see ourselves and others as God sees us. It is from that place that we can begin to love others as Christ commanded -

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” – John 13:34-35 NIV

How we see ourselves is THE most important opinion there is because that is the one we will become. Take time today to forgive yourself, to take care of yourself and to see yourself through God’s eyes. It may seem silly but for the next seven days I would like you to start your day by looking in the mirror and telling yourself, out loud, “I love you.” Say it like you mean it and keep saying it until you believe it!

P.S. Remember that God loves you and so do I!

I love a good bumper sticker.

Some bumper stickers amuse me, some aggravate me, and every once in a while I come across one that really makes me think... or perhaps not.

If we acted on every whim of emotion or every fleeting thought we had our lives would be a train wreck. Let’s be honest - all kinds of crazy ideas and feelings run through our heads and our hearts. We are emotional beings because God created us that way. However we must realize that we are not supposed to be controlled by our emotions. That’s a whole lot easier to type that to walk out!

“The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?” - Jeremiah 17:9 NIV

Here are a few things we can do to climb off of the emotional roller coaster -

1. First figure out what you are feeling/thinking and why. Without this piece of information you are at the mercy of your emotions and thoughts.
2. Second recognize that there is a difference between thought and action. Just because you are justified in feeling or believing a certain way (i.e. hurt, scared, angry, etc.) doesn’t mean that you are justified to act on them. It also doesn’t mean that they are constructive or even grounded in reality (i.e. I was treated badly by one man therefore all men are bad and I cannot trust any man).
3. Finally respond appropriately rather than react emotionally. As Christians we need to submit our thoughts, attitudes, beliefs, emotions and actions to the Scriptures. If truth lies within us then it is subjective and relative to the individual and the individual situation. But if Truth lies somewhere outside of us then right and wrong are constant and unchanging regardless of what we believe or how we feel in a given moment. We may have every ‘right’ to be angry with someone but the ‘righteous’ response is to forgive. It is also what is in YOUR best interest!

The world will tell you that God is trying to constrain you when in reality He is trying to set you free. Free to be in control of your thoughts and emotions. Let’s read on -

“I the Lord search the heart and examine the mind, to reward each person according to their conduct, according to what their deeds deserve.” - Jeremiah 17:10 NIV

God cares and He knows what’s going on inside our hearts. Don’t forget that. When we rise above our own thoughts and emotions to treat others with the same love and grace God showed us it is in that moment we are living our faith. That is the love of Jesus and a life God can’t wait to reward!

What a Jerk!

So the other day I’m driving through the Nantahala Gorge on my way to my parent’s house. For those of you who don’t have the privilege of calling Western North Carolina home let me paint a picture for you. The two lane road winds through the beautiful Blue Ridge Mountains along the banks of the Nantahala River. In the summer months both the road and the river are full of tourists and locals alike eager to experience the adventure the white water has to offer. It’s not uncommon to see skillful anglers waiting for a wary rainbow trout to hit their expertly presented fly. One of the best ways to take in the sights and the sounds is in an open air passenger car aboard the Great Smoky Mountains Railway. Needless to say it is a beautiful drive, but not the best route if you need to get somewhere in a hurry.

So as I’m navigating the twists and turns I notice a vehicle quickly approaching in my rear view mirror. There are several places to pull off to let others pass and I’m inclined to use them (and so should everyone else). I will state for the record that I was driving the speed limit plus 5. After all this is ‘Merica! Apparently this guy fancies himself a budding NASCAR driver because he was drafting me like Talladega Nights. Before I came to a place to let him pass he crossed the double yellow line and blasted by. What a knucklehead.

Of course since I’m a pastor my immediate response was to pray for him, speak blessings over his family and extend unconditional forgiveness… or not. I felt my blood pressure rising. Where did he need to go in such a hurry?! Who was he to put me and everyone else on the road in danger?! Why did he think that he was above the law?! NC’s finest often patrol this stretch of road. I could picture him pulled over, blue lights flashing, the bead of sweat forming on his brow as he calculated the cost as ‘the man’ handed him his well-deserved ticket. I should probably call *HP and get this menace to society off of the streets. After all it’s my civic duty. I owe it to every other law abiding citizen out there.

Except that I was speeding too. And it’s not my job to enforce the law. And I’m sure the guy in the other car hasn’t given it another thought. I’m the one wound up. I’m the one frustrated. What a jerk. Not him - ME! I let someone else into my head, into my heart and gave him the power to determine my state of being. So I had this thought… what if I didn’t care anymore? I’m not talking about people or important things but stuff that I have absolutely no control over. In reality this guy didn’t do anything to me. I wasn’t delayed, I didn’t wreck, we didn’t exchange communiqué via sign language.

What if I focused ONLY on the things that God has given me responsibility for and COMPLETELY trusted Him with EVERYTHING else? My guess is I’d definitely enjoy life’s scenic drives a lot more. I suppose you would too.

The Anatomy of an Apology

Last time I checked there has only ever been exactly one single solitary individual to walk the face of this earth without sinning. I promise it isn't me and I'm fairly certain it's not you either. We drop the ball, we miss the mark, we make mistakes. Face it, we sin. It's part of living in a fallen world. But that isn't an excuse and doesn't absolve us of the responsibility of our actions and/or inactions. We should own up, fess up when we mess up, and apologize. It's interesting how most people mentally agree that everyone fails but the same people who claim to 'not be perfect' act as though they are. They make excuses, rationalize why the behavior of others or the situation justifies them and flat refuse to admit their guilt. It's' crazy.

"Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. On the contrary: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good." - Romans 12:17-21

I think as Christians we ought to be the first to step up, humble ourselves, accept responsibility and ask for forgiveness. When we have come up short so to speak, unintentionally or otherwise, this is how we should respond -

1. Recognize that you have wronged, offended and/or hurt someone else. That's all that matters at this point. This is where being sensitive to the voice of the Holy Spirit is vital. Guilt is good because it leads us back to God, shame is bad because it causes us to withdraw and hide.
2. Repent before God. The sooner the better! Many view repentance only in terms of our initial salvation experience. I believe it should be a hallmark of our lives as believers. God says IF we will confess our sins He WILL forgive them.
3. Pray for peace. In impossible situations God can do amazing things. He can soften the hardest heart and open the door for difficult discussions.
4. Ask for forgiveness. It may be semantics but I rarely if ever say 'I'm sorry'. If you look at the true meaning of the word you are literally saying 'I am a worthless' and regardless of how bad I've screwed up I'm not worthless. My recommendation is that you say, "I apologize for ???, will you forgive me?" One is a statement and the other a question. It requires a response and empowers the other person in the situation. If you don't think it matters just see which one is harder to say.
5. Make amends if possible. If our heart is truly grieved for hurting someone else it is appropriate and right for us to fix what we can. As for what we can't... thank God for grace! For instance - 'I accidentally ran over your mailbox repeatedly. Will you forgive me? Can I replace it for you?'

I think it's safe to say that forgiveness is a BIG DEAL with God so it should be a big deal to us as well. If God cares about something we should too.

 “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift." - Matthew 5:23-24

Betrayal

As the holidays wind down I want to hit the Christmas story from a little different angle. Mother and Child seem to take center stage and rightfully so, the angels and shepherds and wise men all have there time in the spotlight but what about dear old dad?

"This is how the birth of Jesus Christ came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be with child through the Holy Spirit. Because Joseph her husband was a righteous man and did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly." - Matthew 1:18-19

Can you imagine for a moment the sheer sense of betrayal that Joseph felt in that moment? He must have been completely overwhelmed! A man who had determined in his heart to get it right and honor God by waiting to have sex until marriage. What good did that do him? How would any self respecting man feel when his (soon too be) wife shows up pregnant and he KNOWS that he isn't the father? Crushed, furious, ashamed, homicidal, suicidal...?

The first thing I want to point out is that Joseph didn't REACT to the situation. 

"But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.” - Matthew 1:20-21

Reacting in the heat of the moment rarely if ever works out well. Take a breath, take a moment and take it before the Lord. 

"He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin." - Proverbs 13:3

God may have a completely different perspective than you do and regardless of what you are facing he has a plan and a purpose.

"All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: “The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel”—which means, “God with us.” When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife. But he had no union with her until she gave birth to a son. And he gave him the name Jesus." - Matthew 1:22-25

Joseph chose to RESPOND and found himself in one of the leading roles of the greatest story in human history. We have all been betrayed, or thought we have been. Either way it hurts. There is no getting around it. The question is will we allow God to write the story of our lives or will we go off script? Will we allow betrayal to define us or drive us deeper into God and forward in his plans for our lives?